Jeff and Lillian

When I was in Thailand I remember thinking that no matter where I went afterward, it would always be different and never quite as real because I wouldn't have a host family. But the real lesson, I think, is that no matter where you are people are amazing. I spent Saturday night on the top bunk of a bed with a mother and her two children under me, in tiny cement hut in the village just down the road from ILRI. But let me start from the beginning.

While we were at the going away party for Sang, we spent a lot of time with Jeffrey, one of the other cooks. I learned that he was planning to move to the US with his wife in November, to join her sister. Where I asked. Bismark North Dakota. I mentioned that JJ had Fargo at his house and if he wanted to see what the landscape was like, he and the Ithaca boys could come over to watch it. He liked this idea, but instead invited us to his house. So later that evening, we met at the boys' house and got ready to walk home with Jeff.

I don't remember if I have talked about them in the past, but Will (18?) and Ben (16?) are here from Ithaca with their father and mother who is a plant scientist at Cornell on sabbatical. Will's friend Alex also came along, after he and Will graduated early from Ithaca High School. The older boys have been making themselves busy shooting movies all over Kenya, and Ben has been finishing up 10th grade at the international school in Nairobi. Ben is also one of the best young piano players I have heard since PVPA. They are all great guys and some of the more fun people at ILRI to hang out with.

While we were getting ready to go, it became evident that Jeff intended for us to spend the night. None of us were aware of or logistically prepared for this, but plans were made, numbers were given to parents, and we headed off down the road. In the dark it was not immediately obvious that we were 4 white kids in the middle of a somewhat rundown bustling market street on the outside of a large village. We made our way along the curb, around cars, and through people for about 15 minutes and then took a left off the road onto a residential path. The power had gone out so from candle light we saw homes, butcher shops, and fruit stands on either side. A smiling young woman met us on the path and we were introduced to Jeff's wife Lillian who is about my age and size. Then we took a right, ducked through a green metal gate with a door sized for 10 year olds, and found ourselves in the communal back yard of about 4 houses.

The power came back as we were shown into Jeff and Lillian's family room. It was small but comfortable, everything a different shade of blue, with plenty of seating reminiscent of dorm lounge furniture and seashells and candle sticks above the windows. There was a clock with a painting of the Eiffel Tour on in and the cloth on the circular table was red. We took our shoes off and sat down. The kitchen was no larger than a small bathroom so we were not permitted to help with the cooking for physical reasons. The DVDs I had brought could not be read by his DVD player, so instead we watched an episode of 24 from somewhere in the middle of one of the later seasons. We also enjoyed hot coffee and milk, and sandwiches made with butter and grated cheddar cheese. Jeff's twin sister (whose name I unforgivably can't remember) came over with her two children, a girl (again, the name eludes me) dressed completely in pink around 4 years, and a 4 month old boy named Stanley. She said hello, handed the baby to one of the boys, and went deeper into the house with Lillian. I took the opportunity to squeeze into the kitchen with Jeff and see what he was cooking.

I don't remember the names of the dishes, but there was a vegetable dish with peppers, carrots and tomatoes in a thick sauce, rice cooked with meat and spices, kale and spinach sauteed with onions, and a salad made from tomatoes, carrots, and avocado, simply dressed with lemon juice. Later a dish made from beans, peas, and pumpkin seeds would be remembered and retrieved from the microwave. As he cooked Jeff and I talked about the names of foods, cooking, being newlyweds, and the importance of having a well equipped kitchen. He was proud of his kitchen and I could tell he had spent a lot of money on the pots hanging above the sink. The water in the village only runs every few days, so a large covered bucket is housed next to the sink to provide washing and cooking water. The curtain in the window was white with red strawberries on it.

When it was time to eat Jeff said grace and we dug in. Ben got stuck holding the baby while we were getting food, but he didn't seem to mind. We ate and talked for a long time about Jeff and Lillian's move to North Dakota and what they could expect. We did the best we could, despite the fact that none of us had been there. We also talked about different cultures and when I asked what the significance was of the picture of flowers behind the TV being upside down, Jeff just laughed and turned it around. Evidently someone had moved it while cleaning and nobody had noticed. Then the coffee table was precariously propped up on a chair, a queen sized mattress was put on the floor for the boys, and I was told I would be sleeping in one of the bedrooms. I pretended to be disappointed at having to sleep alone, but Jeff just smiled and reassured me that I would NOT be alone. There was one bathroom with a porcelain hole in the floor, a bucket of water next to it, and toothbrushes hanging neatly on the wall. Jeff and Lillian had a bedroom but I never saw it.

Stanley, having been the most quiet and docile baby ever all evening, decided it was time to start crying, so we played with his sister while he was put to bed. She did not know any English, and was shy at first, but nothing a little peek-a-boo behind a place matt couldn't dissolve. Soon we were tickling and biting her feet and she was on the mattress shrieking with laughter. She didn't want to go to bed, but when I crying stopped we decided it was time to turn in. Lillian brought me a stool so I could climb into the upper bunk, and Jeff's sister and the kids went to bed below me. The combination of coffee, a full bladder, and dogs barking outside kept me up for a while, staring at the corrugated tin roof above my head, but eventually I got some sleep.

I woke up early to singing and shouting outside. If Jeff's sister had still been in bed, she would have seen a leg and foot searching for a way to reach the stool over the banister for a good minute or two, before squeezing between the bed and the wall to get down. But to my relief, only the kids were there, still asleep. I became painfully aware of the inflexibility of people raised in developed countries as I finally relieved my bladder and then went out into the living room. The curtains there were darker and the boys were fast asleep. I sat in a chair and watched Lillian and her sister in law go in and out of the house, preparing breakfast. The boys finally woke up, I was accused of being creepy for watching them sleep, and they bickered about snoring and bad breath.

The children's mother did her best to feed them some porridge but Stanley kept spitting it out and his sister would not eat it. In her frustration she swatted at her daughter but heard me laugh when I saw this and began laughing herself. Then the baby was passed around as we ate a huge breakfast of eggs, toast, butter, honey, tea with milk, and oranges. When it was time to go, Jeff and Lillian walked back with us and I had a chance to talk to Lillian for a while. She is currently volunteering with young mothers, teaching them first aid and basic life skills. They also make cards and jewelry out of paper beads that they sell to make money for the organization. I am hopefully going to visit with them one day soon.

At the roundabout, we were stopped by a man with a camera who told us we could not walk through unless we paid to have our picture taken. Apparently ILRI did not like the path that was forming from people walking through, so they gave this man permission to require photos of those wishing to pass. We got together, squinted into the sun, and got a receipt for 4 prints which we could pick up on Monday. Then we said goodbye and I went back to bed until 3 pm.

On another note, I am off to Busia (the countryside) tomorrow morning at 5 am. I will be there until Sunday and I expect to have limited internet access. It is supposed to be hot, beautiful, and rife with Malaria. I will tell you all about it when I get back!